There are days you’d do over again if you could; days when you didn’t get it quite right, when the distance between who you want to be and you are is as wide as a galaxy.
There are days when you slacked off and simply got it done because you were tired and wanted to go home; you told yourself that no one would know the difference and your best efforts could wait for another day, the next task.
There are days when you took refuge in the sound of the radio because the silence in the car was too uncomfortable; the ride to school didn’t go well and you glared threat into the rear view mirror and watched your children climb out with a silent “good riddance” in your mind; the welcoming smile of the teacher on the curb mocking you in your frustration.
There are days when you wake up having barely slept, regretting the night before. The sun went down on your wrath and rises on your shame.
There are days when you thought you’d moved on only to discover that you haven’t; an old memory stokes a fresh grief that feels like it will never go away. There are days you have to try hard not to cry and days when you couldn’t cry if you wanted to.
There are days you swear you’ll quit, you’ll walk if it happens again and if something around that place doesn’t change; on that same day you remember you really can’t do that.
There are days when God’s grace opened a door and you couldn’t walk through it. You barely noticed it because something was restless in you. You kept moving, no peace of mind. How blessed we are that grace follows us and comes our way over and over whether we look for it or not.
Paul had such a day. He remembered it clearly, a specific time and place. Paul found himself in Troas, waiting to rejoin Titus who was bringing word to him about the state of the church in Corinth, particularly their relationship with and regard for Paul. Paul was at odds with this congregation and anxious to make things right.
In 2 Corinthians 11 when Paul lists his weaknesses, the weaknesses in which he boasts, he mentions his constant anxious concern for the churches. At Troas, Paul’s weakness got the better of him. He missed the open door, missed what God was doing right in front of him.
And there are days when our weaknesses will get the better of us. God is in the everyday, but we will not see it every day. Fatigue, distraction, regrets, grudges – any number of things can keep us from seeing it. But in our weaknesses God is faithful.
There are days, more than we care to admit, when the best that can be said about the day is just that: God is faithful. Maybe this is one of those days. Grace will follow you through it. Thanks be to our all sufficient God.
Gracious God, every one of our days comes to us as a gift. We do not always receive them that way. There are days we’d gladly forget, days when we ignore the door of opportunity, days when weakness gets the best of us. In every such day you walk with us. Great is your faithfulness and we give you thanks in Jesus’ name. Amen.